Unwritten Shames
by Mysterious Miracle
Summary: Collection of song fics. Breezepaw reflects on life, Daisy has a hidden, lethal secret, Squirrelflight wishes to have Brambleclaw back after a tragic accident, Swiftpaw thinks back on the night Brightpaw and he were attacked by the dogs, and many others.
1. It's Not to Late

**Never to Late**

_"'Cause it's not too late, It's never too late...__"_

--

_'What did I do?'  
'Why do you hate me?'  
'Why won't you treat me like Heatherpaw for once?'_

Thats what went through my mind as I stared into the deep black moving blacket of freezeing water. My mind raced,  
I knew what was going to happen. I was going to jump in, I would, I will. I prepared to jump, sudden coldness crawled up my spine.

_'You could have stopped this'_

_'Mother's dead, Its just you and me, no Its just you. You, thats all that matters isn't it father?'  
_  
A image of a light tabby flashed through my mind.

_'Her. You and her, thats it! You didn't love Mother! You loved her. You never-"_

"Breezepaw!"

I hear your vocie behind me, I can hear you running to me, your going to save me from myself.  
Don't save me from myself, save me from you.  
I jump, feeling the wind blow over my face for the last time as I fell to my death.  
The black water gripped at my heart, and chocked me untill I cryed out, gasping for breath as my life slipped away.  
I see your image running up and down the riverbank, looking for me. You cry for help, no one is going to come, you know it.  
I'm not struggling anymore, I let the black blanket wash over me, a pure blackness washed over my vision. I frailed around in the silent, deadly water, thrashing around, clawing my way up. I'll never make, I can telll it when I loss the feeling in my paws.  
I know I am still alive, but I can't see you anymore, I can't see anything.  
The current is pulling me away from you, I feel paws grasped my shoulders and yank me upward.  
Its too late, I can tell there are several cats, I am going to die, tell them to leave me alone!

"Breezepaw? Breezepaw! Oh My Starclan, Crowfeather what happened?"

I hear her and my heart runs cold, I forgot about her.  
What will she think? What will happen to her if I'm dead?  
You don't say anything, and she presses against Barkface, trying to see me better.  
I probably look rough, I wish she wasn't here to see me in such a pore state.

"Hollypaw! Get off Windclan's territory!" I snarl, a weak snarl. Its her brother, I hate him.  
He thinks he's so much better than her and orders her around.  
Say something back to him, say something for me.

"Lionpaw," She says, almost as if she can hear my thoughts, "I hate you."

I smile, I've wait so long to hear those words from her, I want to get up and congradulate her, but Barkface  
says that 'I'm alive' and starts to work the water out of my system, but its to late.  
I start to panic, I feel my body gasp for air, but my lungs are full of water, its too late.

She leans close to my ear, I feel her breath on my neck, I want to calm down, but I continue shaking.

"Its not to late, Breezepaw. Its never to late."

With that you step back and join my father, its like you are willing to accept that I'm not going to be here any longer.  
I go into convultions, spitting out water, but not nearly fast enough to survive.  
I feel my body go numb, and my vision is black.  
And the last thing I think is about you.

_"I never got to see you."  
"I never got say 'Good bye' to you"_  
_"But I got to hear your voice, for the very last time."  
_  
When my body stills, You walk forward and and press your head into my fur and draw you touge over my head.  
The last words you spoke to me where the most love-filled words I ever heard.

_Its not to late, Breezepaw, Its never to late."_

_--_

**Well, I think that turned out pretty good.  
Who should I do next? **


	2. Face Down

**Face Down**

_"F_ace _down in the dirt she says, this doesn't hurt she says I finally had enough..."_

_--  
"He'll forgive you."  
"He's probably moved on, too."  
_  
I crawled silently out of the nursery, leaving my kits laying in the warm nest.  
I heard the rhythmatic breathing of the cats in the camp, the warm night air blew my fur around me.  
I hesitated when I reached the tunnel, I turned back to the Warriors Den.  
My paws felt drawn to it, I knew I didn't want to go back there alone.  
I poked my head in the den and inhaled the scents, he was there.

_"Your going to make the difficult on yourself. Just go."_

I turned padded back to the thorn barrier and ducked under it.  
A owl hooted somewheres in the distance, making me jump.  
A twig snapped behind me, I turned my head to examine my pursuer, no one was there.  
I picked up my pace.

Suddenly the outline of the barn came into sight, I smelled the familiar scents of my-  
My ex-mate. I smelled milk up ahead and heard the voice of my sister.

"Daisy? Smokey, Daisy's back!"

Another shape moved smoothly out of the barn, the end of my tail quivered at his sight.  
I recalled the last time I saw him, I ran away that night, taking my kits with me.  
Floss nodded to me and retreated back inside the den, then it hit me, Floss was having kits.

"Congratulations!"

I called after her, she didn't acknowledge what I said. Smokey moved forward toward me until I was back up against one of the barn's outside walls.  
He swiped a unsheathed paw across my face, causing me to land face down in the dirt.

"This doesn't hurt."

I say as he's about to finish me off.

"I've finally had enough."

And as he brings his paws down on my head, I remember thinking one thing.

_"Did you feel like a man when you pushed me around? Do feel better now that I fall to the ground?"_

--

**w00p w00p! 2ed Chapter! 3 more reviews UPDATE!!**

**I'm doing Swiftpaw next I need a song for him.**


	3. How to Save a Life

**How to Save a Life**

_"Between the lines of fear and blame, you begin to wonder why you came..."_

--

Teeth curved around to meet my defending paw, I streaked around the huge creature.  
Your fighting one of the dogs close to a tree, you glance at me once, your eyes full of fear.  
Somewhere between Fear and blame, I clawed half way up a tree before being pulled down by a dog.  
Blood puddled around me as you fell to the ground, afraid you were dead, I hobbled over to you.  
Half way there I saw you breathing shallowly, then a dog slapped me against a nearby tree.

Now I sit beside you, you never see me. You do stare right through me, to that white warrior.  
How dare you! I _died _trying to make us warriors! He was made a warrior before us for no reason!  
Then he sat there and boasted about how much better he was than us!  
I thought you loved _me_! I thought we could be!

I watched Cloudtail padd toward you and sit beside you.  
He impresses you with his skills, and about how your face doesn't matter.  
To him you know it does, Think about _now _Brightheart! Where is he?  
He's padding after that cream kittypet isn't he?

I never cared about the way you looked, your still beautiful to me!  
I'm sorry, and I blame myself for face, but then you were just an apprentice.  
Now look at you! Your so skilled! We _were _might to be, look at Cloudtail now, he's always with Daisy!  
Why don't you throw something at him? Take up with Squirrleflight, you to can beat Cloudtail and Ashfur into a corner!  
I'm sorry, Brightheart. And just so you know, Starclan never called you by _Lostface, _Bluestar lost her mind.

I mean, who would want that name anyway. Guess who made your name?  
No, not Firestar, I told him to name you that! I guess Cloudtail did help, some. Only by teaching you how to fight.  
Tell Whitewing I said 'Hey', She's beautiful just like her mother. Rosekit is safe, I'm sorry about her to, I tried to help but, I didn't know what to do.  
Tell me one thing, Brightheart, when I told you about when you two fell in love, how did you forget me so fast?

I _love _you! When does Cloudtail ever say that? I can tell you he'll never understand how mad you are, He thinks  
you can't stop loving him. That happens alot, think about Daisy and how she had to leave Smokey for the sake of her kits.  
They stop loving each other the moment she left, and if you don't believe me, go by the barn and see if you don't smell milk.  
Floss had his kits, she's got five, right after Daisy's kits became apprentices Floss gave birth.  
You see, others know that theres still a good chance that they may fall out of love, and as quick as they fell in it.  
Cloudtail is one of those exceptions, honestly do you think he would be with Daisy right now if your face wasn't hurt?  
He doesn't think your going anywhere, so I have one thing to say before I go.  
"I'm sorry. Had I known How to save a life-"

Brightpaw nuzzled Swiftpaw and laughed at his latest joke. The fireflys danced around them showing them the better side of life.  
Swiftpaw cuffted her ear playfully and leaped away from her. His tail waved side to side, Brightpaw laughed again and fell onto her back.  
Swiftpaw joined her, watching the stars with pure curiosity.  
"Hey Swiftpaw?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Do you, um, Do you-"  
"Like you?"  
"Yeah."  
"Yeah, I do." Swiftpaw looked over to her, she was brimming with happiness.  
"What about Cloudtail, I think he likes me."  
"I love you."  
"I love you too, Swiftpaw."

The crickets churped and the fireflys continued sparking. The night sky stayed the same deep blue color.  
The a star flew across the sky. Brightpaw raisied a paw and pointed it where the star had left a light streak across the sky.

"Did you see that?"  
"Yeah, maybe its a sign."  
"Together?"  
"Forever, no matter what." Swiftpaw's eyes never left Brightpaw.

"Hey Brightpaw?"  
"Yes?"  
"You really know how to save a life."

**--  
OMG, I'm like crying right now!  
Maybe I should make this one a story... It went very well I feel Like!  
Ok, Vote for one of these along with your review!**

Leaf X Crow  
Jay X Cinder  
Lion X Heather  
Ash X Squirrel

Ok PLEASE vote, there shall be no new chapter if no one votes!  
I take vote from those who don't have accounts too!


	4. Im Sorry

**Sorry**

_**"'Cause everything inside it never comes out right, and when I see you cry it makes me wanna die."  
**__  
**-**_

I stood at the highest hill that over looked Windclan territory.

I was a fool for looking for you. Feeling the grief of losing you wash over me, I fell to the ground.  
My wall between sanity and insanity came crumbling down as images of you flashed in front of me.  
You were happily crowning me as Lionclaw, Warrior of Darkclan. Then you were pouncing on a frog by the small stream.

How did I lose you? How did I lose something so dear to me?  
In my distress, I fell down the hill, and in to a small clearing. I felt something inside of me cringe causing me to do the same. I saw you walk out of nowhere and let out a wail so saddened that it caused my heart to skip. You crumbled to the ground and tears fell down your cheeks.  
That face wasn't made for tears.

"Heatherpaw!"

My body lunged and I felt sick, then you evaporated into the atmosphere.  
The pain! Make it stop, oh starclan help me! I pulled grass up by the roots with the pain that erupted in my chest. I continued pulling it up until I was lying in a bare spot. Seeing you cry was making me want to die, it was so painful.  
Then you appeared on a nearby tree limb, you raked your claws down the bark and let out a caterwaul of sorrow. Then prepared to jump to the ground.

"Heatherpaw, don't!"

I called, trying to make the love of my life not plunge to her death. You jumped and fell to the ground, dead. I let out a wail of grief at you began to disappear. This is the way it happened; I hate it, so cruel.

"Lionpaw! Lionpaw, are you okay?" I hear Hollypaw call out, I looked at where it was coming from, and there was Jaypaw and Hollypaw pelting to me. Everything sounded low and drowned out, so it was hard to understand them. I opened my mouth to say something to them, but Jaypaw reached into my mouth and pulled out some of the scarlet berries, they understood my plan.

"Lionpaw! Lionpaw what were you thinking!"

Hollypaw's voice sounded low and dragged out, the corners of my vision was starting to blacken.  
Jaypaw thrust a plant into my mouth and I spat it back at him. Hollypaw yowled at me and put it back in my mouth. This time I didn't do anything, my heart stopped, and I stopped breathing.  
I saw a small tabby and my grandfather.

"Heatherpaw, I sorry."

She nodded and Tigerstar stepped forward.

"Welcome to the Dark Forest, Lionpaw."  
The last voice I heard was my grandfather's voice.


	5. Numb

**Numb**

_"Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes, every step that I take is another mistake to you…"_

"Tawnypaw, go change the elders bedding, your late already!"  
My mentor called, sighing, I stood and padded lightly to the elders den. I knew I would get my head bit off by Smallear for this. I poked my head in the den, and held my chin high, careful not to drag the moss on the ground. I noticed Sorrelkit in the corner listening to Smallear.

"What did he look like, Smallear?"  
The elderly tom flicked his ear at me, Sorrelkit's eyes followed it.  
She gasped and padded over to me, and sniffed me anxiously.  
Sorrelkit looked up at me, her eyes filled pure curiosity.

"As for you," Smallear's attention flew to me, "You're late."  
I dipped my head to the tom, realizing that Bramblepaw had already changed the bedding, I changed my tactic.  
"Do you want me to check for ticks?"  
"No," Smallear snorted, "Thornpaw did that."  
I rolled my eyes and began smashing the moss into a easier to carry form.

"You know," Smallear mewed thoughtfully, "Tigerstar never liked changing bedding either."  
I threw what moss I had down on the floor and charged out, mind racing.  
I saw Bramblepaw, I didn't care I just pushed past him.

"They don't understand! They don't have a murderous father! They live out their perfect little lives just to complain about them!"

By the time I had calmed down, I was sitting on a hill, and it was nightfall.  
Each star twinkled above individually. I was alone for once in my life.  
I hated them, they hated me. I let out a yowl of anger and watched it seep into the sky. I hoped they felt my anger, my hurt, my pain.

"Tawnypaw?"  
I jumped at the sound, why was he here? Oh, Starclan I hate you!

"Tawnypaw, Do you want to talk? I won't tell anyone… Tawnypaw?"  
Tears were streaming down my face, a chance to talk, a chance to be heard, a chance to be understood!  
I nodded and he sat down beside me, letting his tail lay flat on the ground beside me.  
He waited patiently for me to pull myself together.

"Everyone hates me. They think I'm going to be like Tigerstar."  
"Not everyone, Tawnypaw."

I looked up at him, my eyes still puffy with tears.  
He purred and licked my head, if just for one night, Starclan let someone love me.

"No one hates you, the she-cats are jealous. They'll get over it."  
I still was looking into his amber eyes, I couldn't even move, everything felt frozen. No wind, no smells…

"Tawnypaw?"  
He whispered, nuzzling my fur, I bent down to wash a patch of chest fur.  
"Hm?"  
"Do you think it could be… Me and you for tonight?"  
"Just for tonight."  
"Why?" He looked puzzled.  
"Because I'm numb, you do want an emotionless she-cat."  
"Numb? Why, what happened?"  
"Because I've been under the pressure of walking in his paw steps to long."  
"Then lets fix that! If you have a mate, they'll think your okay!"  
"Only for tonight, we'll see about that later."

I laid my head on his shoulder, thanking Starclan for giving me a chance.

"One more thing Tawnypaw?"

"What?"

"Do you love me?"

"Yes Thornpaw, I think I do."


	6. Burnin' Up

**Burnin' Up**

_"I'm slipping into the lava, and I'm trying keep from going under, Baby You turn the temperature hotter, Cause I'm burning up, Burning up  
For you baby"_

--

I stalked silently through the bushes, creeping along the undergrowth after you. You stop and scent, I'm downwind, but you drop into a hunters crouch. I lift my head and scent, Mouse! That was what you were after! I stayed down, hoping you wouldn't see me. Finally, you move past the mouse, giving up when it ran into a patch of thorns. I moved forward until your scent wafted around me, I put my paw down once more, Crack! Oh no, that was me, I turn to leave before you discover me.

"Jaypaw, where you going?"

My tail goes limp when you meow. I crawl out of the bushes, looking like a kit that was caught leaving from camp. You stare at me, and then laugh unexpectedly. I glance up at you, unseeing eyes blink in confusion. You just continue padding up the hill, I follow.

"Jaypaw, why are you following me?"

I shake my head, not wanting to say anything. I pick up my pace in order to keep up with you, you laugh and speed off. I try to follow, but you go to fast and I stop to regain my grounds. The cold wind blows across my face and the smell of heather pounds down on me. Windclan! Someone I really wish wasn't here shows up to ruin everything.

"Jaypaw! Get off our territory!" Breezeheart growls at me as he pads up naturally. I smell you racing back toward me, fear overwhelms you. Your afraid of him?

"Jaypaw come back here!" You mew hurriedly, trying to nudge me away. I won't move, I'm determined to stay here, to give him a piece of his own herbs.

"No." You stop and look at me, eyes full of fear and confusion. You push me away, but I walk back to the tom.

"Besides who said you were leaving so easily?" Breezeheart sneers at you, you cower back raise you front paw defensively. He starts toward you, anger overwhelms me and I fly at the black tom. Before he can react, I have him pinned, and I claw his stomach.

"Blind kit, run back to Squirrelflight!" I hiss and slap him with unsheathed claws, he growls and jumps at me. I claw across his stomach again and wiggle out from under him. Then run over to you.

"Lets go back to camp." I mew and you nod, then turn around and pad with me back home.

"Don't forget Cinderpaw!" Breezeheart hisses after us, "I will be watching!"

--

**This probably wasn't as good as it could be but JayxCinder is hard x)!**

**So whats next?**


	7. Cold As You

**Cold As You**

_"You have a way of coming easily to me, and when you take, you take the very best of me. So I start a fight 'cause I need to feel something, and you do what you want cause I'm not what you wanted…"_

I stared at the gray warrior talking away in front of me. I nodded at his carless small talk like I was actually paying attention… but I wasn't I was thinking of you….

I remembered being that small, annoying little apprentice that got on your nerves so bad you could have ripped my fur off. You were so cute when you were agitated. I remembered how I admired you on the great journey, and how happy I was when Starclan picked me.

You stood across the clearing, and I couldn't help but look at you. An exceptionally cold air blew around me. Your eyes scanned the clearing, like you were waiting for badgers to jump out at any moment, which was just like you. Your eyes lingered on me and I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Hey, are you okay?" Ashfur's mew was worried, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from you to pay any attention. You looked away and shook your head, like you disapproved of me. I suddenly felt like everyone could see strait into my soul. Like they knew everything I ever had and wanted. I would say you broke my heart, but you didn't… You shattered it into a million tiny pieces and kicked them around on your way out.

Sometimes I felt bad about using Ashfur, but I didn't feel bad enough to stop. Maybe I was cruel, maybe I was wrong, but I would do anything to have you back. What could I say? I missed you.

What's left of my heart stops, you start walking this way. I completely forget about Ashfur sitting in front of me, telling me about how wonderfully his last hunt went. You stare at me, your amber eyes cut into me. The constant buzz of Ashfur's talking stops, and I know he sees him.

I can feel the tension in the air, just like before. I couldn't help but admire you.

I remembered the day Feathertail died, I remembered how fast I grew up on that journey and how much you blamed yourself for her death.

I wish I could tell you how sorry I am for being such a pain… for hating your brother… for leaving you.  
Ashfur's voice shakes me, but I refuse to look away from you, because I know what will happen when I do. I refuse to let it happen.

I want to tell you how much I have missed you. I want you to know how hard it has been not talking to you. You were my everything. I threw everything away over your stupid decision. That would have made you mad, if I said that. You would say it was not stupid and you don't ask me not to talk to Leafpool. I know you don't ask me to do that… But if you did, I would.

I never wanted to be without you. I always wanted to be with you; you were my protector. You keep walking, and I smile, waiting for you to sit next to me. Oh, how I have missed you.

But you didn't get the chance. A violent sense of panic surged through me; I kept my eyes on you. I _would not _look away. They couldn't make me. I felt like I was floating, though I knew I was lying on the ground in camp, staring and dreaming of you as you walked toward me. I would not look away.

"Squirrelflight!" Ashfur's voice shook me. I felt myself want to look away, but I wouldn't let myself. No, I would not let you slip away again.

"Squirrelflight!" Ashfur was screaming now, like he had found out. I suddenly felt scared. So scared. I couldn't wrap my head around it, but I felt like I was drowning… and then it hit me.

I was drowning in my own lies.

"Squirrelflight!" Leafpool's voice caught my attention, I hadn't seen her here. I looked around for my sister, and then felt anger in my chest. I looked away. I whipped my head back to you, but you were already slowly disappearing.

"NO!" I screamed, standing and you smiled at me. I felt my legs go weak, I failed, "No…no, no, no, no."

"Talk to me sister!" A sudden stabbing pain in my chest made me gasp for air, and suddenly, we weren't in Thunderclan camp anymore. We were in the forest, and I felt water flowing from my mouth. My fur was drenched, and I was cold; so very, very cold.

"Squirrelflight." Your voice was like hearing a million Starclan cats sing. It was refreshing and warming, and most importantly, I forgot that I, once again, failed.

You walked toward me, and after waiting so long, you finally touched your nose to mine.

"It's time, Squirrelflight." Your eyes smiled at me, and I stood. I looked at you for a long moment before looking back. I was still lying, motionless on the ground with Leafpool and Ashfur beside me. Leafpool was crying heavily and Ashfur was shaking his head. I realized I didn't fail, I got exactly what I wanted.

"They will be better. All wounds heal in time." You told me, and turned to the bright light that threatened to engulf us. No, it didn't threaten us, it offered.

You were right. All would did heal in time, I hadn't felt so happy since the mourning I told you to have a happy dawn patrol. That was the last time I was truly happy. That was the last time I saw you before the accident. I remembered Lionblaze running back, screaming about a boulder coming lose and fall upon you. I didn't believe him.

And after all this time of waiting, I finally got to tell you what I didn't tell you that morning, that one time I broke tradition. I always told you to be careful and that I loved you. That morning I was in a hurry because Jayfeather told me I needed to come help with some of the sick kits. I only told you to be careful.

"Brambleclaw, I love you." I whispered and you smiled at me, but I didn't need to hear you say, because I already knew.

"I love you, too." We stepped into the light together and just before we went to join Silverpelt together, I said one more thing.

"I know."

**A/N: YAY! NEW CHAPTER! If you didn't understand, Brambleclaw had died in an accident and Squirrelflight felt guilty and tried to kill herself a few times and finally managed to succeed. **


End file.
